| so yeah... |
[30 Jul 2006|03:35am] |
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The past few days have been good yet bad somewhat. I have been talking to this one girl Portia for a couple days, since I made a new VampireFreaks account. I met her on there; well, she met me on there. We talked for like seven hours last night. It was amazing. So yeah, I guess she is my girlfriend now. I say that because I know it will take a couple days to kick in, seeming as how we have been together for like a few hours. I want to see her too. I might see her tomorrow. It would be awesome. Anyway, I am done.
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| um... |
[18 Jul 2006|10:21pm] |
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So, the Firebird project is moving along. Ed got his stepdad out to look at the car, and he told us exactly what to do. So we cut up the old frame like he said, and the new frame will be cut up, sandblasted, and welded with the saved pieces of the old frame to make some Frankenstein-looking frame, which should be really strong and good. I wanted to buy some parts off a guy in Indiana, but he wanted insane prices for his. I also drove up to the place Tim works at to look at what sweet cars he had. They have a '67 Mustang I want, for $300. They also have a Nova SS, Model T, and some sweet Jeep I like. I am pretty confused though, apparently I am with someone, namely Ed's sister. I don't know how, but hey, I like her a lot. So it all works, and Cody is happy.
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| yeah |
[14 Jul 2006|12:31am] |
| [ |
mood |
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embarrassed |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Through Glass by Stone Sour |
] |
So I think I like this girl. I spent the night at her friend's house last night all the way in Port Huron, and got to hang out with her and her friends. She has like the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. Seriously. She looks unlike anyone I've ever really liked. That doesn't really say much though, but she does have a kickin' personality. So yeah, I don't know what else to say other than the fact that it feels real strange to have this girl randomly enter my sight the way she does; it's like I have tunnel vision or something. She just stands out, and I can't help but look back at her when she looks at me. I feel stupid. Alright enough talking about her, the words I used and everything are probably giving off a strong scent, and I don't want people thinking I'm like crazy for this girl. I won't do the "Tom Cruise jumping on Oprah's Couch" thing unless some certain things happen.
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| oh man! |
[10 Jul 2006|11:29am] |
| [ |
mood |
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cheerful |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
T.V. |
] |
Dude, last night was awesome. I basically had a threesome; I am not joking. I slept with two girls, one of which was topless. It was the sweetest thing. It could've been better, but hey, pimping comes at a price. I'll have pictures on my MySpace soon. It was awesome though, I can't stop thinking about it. I got to feel boobs. They were next to me. It felt great. I think I am developing a like for one of the girls. Anyway, I'll stop talking about it.
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| yeah |
[08 Jul 2006|12:04am] |
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So I moved into my new apartment. It was sweet when we first set it up, it looked like there was a hotel party in here. The couch was overturned and next to the sliding glass door, there was a bag of pancake mix and a floor lamp in the bathtub, a Sesame Street record on the floor; yeah it was awesome. I wanted to leave it how it was but we decided to organize it a little. There still is a big mess but I will take care of that soon. Today happened to be like a rollercoaster; it was up and down. The upside: I saw a Plymouth Superbird down the street, and had my interview at Guitar Center and happened to find out that they had a B.B. King Lucille, which I drooled over almost as much as the Superbird. I also got some homework done and have organized plans to do the rest of it. I also believe I got my Firebird sponsored for parts and stuff. The downside: I somehow failed my math test today, even though I took notes and it seemed all right to me. I owe the bank money so I was freaking out nonstop all day. My mom should help out because it is only 57 dollars, but I just hate this. I need a job, so I will hunt for one that I believe I would be good at. Some people say I might be a little picky, but in all reality I don't like grocery stores, fast food or restaraunts to work at. It means I will look for a job at either Napa Auto or another auto place, a guitar store, or music store, or anything else I can think of. I really just see it as this: I would rather get a part-time job doing something I am comfortable with and know a little about rather than have a part-time job with something I don't like. I have enough to deal with in school because I go full-time there, but I still need a job. It would be sweet if I got something in electronics or something.
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| yeah |
[11 Jun 2006|01:24am] |
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I hate having to deal with wanting someone and knowing I probably cannot have them. I still have hope, faith, and some sort of a wish to have them. It just sucks. It is just one of those things I cannot fully explain. I do not know why I am feeling this way. Oh well, I just have to wait and see. I did manage to get some sweet tools today though. Even if I have nothing to fix, I can just sit there and stare at the tools I got. I got these sweet open-end wrenches and a breaker bar. I want to get some more tools, so I think I will once I get my whole tool set. I ordered a 263-piece tool set today. I also got a 35mm SLR camera, with all the stuff. It is from the 70s or something. I only paid like 10 dollars for it, and it is like a brand new camera. I think tomorrow I will go find something to do. Maybe change my looks a little bit.
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| ugh |
[04 Jun 2006|09:14pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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heartbroken |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Ringing |
] |
Well, she broke up with me a few minutes ago. I'm really depressed as it is, and now I'm crying. I'll admit it, I'm fucking crying. It is the worst thing to have your heart broken. It's even worse when this is the first real relationship you have had on your own; no internet, long distance relationship. What's worse than that is when you truly love the person you are with - you'd be willing to make sacrifices, choices, and devotions you wouldn't normally do for just anyone. This person was different. I can't believe she did that. I feel like it's my fault. Everything. I don't care if you are sitting there, rolling your eyes like you've heard this a thousand times from your friends. Love is love, heartbreak is heartbreak. I feel very empty inside; alone, just me and the keyboard and monitor in front of me. It is quiet, and the only sound other than the ringing in my ears from crying so hard and the beating of my torn-up heart is the computer fan. I wish there was a girl to comfort me right now. The girl who would sit next to me, hug me, tell me everything is alright. She would try to calm down my nerves and take the pain, guilt, and uncontrollable shaking away. Again, I don't care if you think that is stupid. I may look scary to you, or I may be able to make you laugh so hard you could swear you are swimming in your wet pants, but just as extreme I can be in a good or bad mood, I can be even worse in a depressed mood. I know that if or when you have had your heart broken, you have wanted the same. Maybe you wanted more, such as a nice cigarette, some weed and alcohol, or maybe a fresh, sharp razor to divert the pain. There are no friends left to comfort me anymore; not that there were to begin with, although there probably were some at some time. I guess I should shut up now. Congratulate yourself if you actually took the time to read all of this. Maybe you will leave me some positive comments; not that you have to.
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| yeah... |
[29 May 2006|11:36pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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calm |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Silence |
] |
This past week has not been good, but at least I got to spend some time with my hunny today. We patched things up; it was getting really bad. I won't go into it because we are back to usual now. I need some time to get used to some things. I need a cigarette. I smoked one the other day and I felt really good, it was weird. My nerves have been on edge all week and still are in some ways, and the cigarettes seem to ease the pain. Not that I'm starting smoking or anything, just one here or there to calm me down is always good. I saw two movies today; the Da Vinci Code, and Take the Lead. Both were awesome. I saw Take the Lead with my baby, and we had a good time. So everything seems alright; I hope Jessica and I can hang out more often this week and not have any more repeats of last week. I love her very dearly.
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| yes |
[03 May 2006|10:20pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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thankful |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Silence |
] |
She's my girlfriend now. I'm so happy.
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| oh yes |
[02 May 2006|11:46pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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excited |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Can the ringing in your ears be music? |
] |
The past few days have been awesome. I hung out with Breana and she introduced me to Jessica, and Jessica happens to be a very beautiful girl. I like her a lot. She makes me very happy and all when I hang out with her, because I can just be myself, and she can be herself and it all works very smoothly. It's pretty strange in the way that she basically is my dream girl, Breana told me she knew I would think she was because Breana said she knew exactly how I was and she knew I would definitely like this girl. I was stunned when I met her; that has never happened before. She just... uh, words cannot describe. I'm kind of scared at this point though, I really haven't had a thing this close before, so I need to learn a few things and use the stuff I already know to pull this one off. I hope to ask her to be my girlfriend soon, if I work up the nerve and hopefully she will say yes. Yes, these past few days have been amazing.
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